Divine Messages Appreciator T-Shirts

"Not at all the sort of comment one was expecting."

"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."

'I don't remember predetermining THAT!'

"Would you like to leave a message? He's on the throne"

Jesus sighted walking off Malibu

'When you pray, does God have call waiting?'

'I wonder if there's a message up there somewhere.'

'Hello, Pastor Parker here. Thank you for calling moral support. Your call may be monitored to ... '

"The deadline for compliance just kicked in."

Hermes, Process Server Of The Gods

'Boy, that felt good! I can see why the devil has so much fun. And no, I'm not letting you in! But tell him I said hello.'

Heaven

''Adam and Eve'? -- then You're going ahead with the dualism idea?'

"I'm a pastor. My job is to speak 20 minutes on Sunday and listen the rest of the week."

Today's presentation - God's Miracles.

'Stay back from the edge. Remember what happened to the last angel that fell.'

'The diagnostic computer thinks it's a punishment from God.'

'I thought everybody would be equal here'

"All of my manifestations are currently busy however your prayer is important to me so please..."

'I think we're going to need an ANNOTATED edition.'

Priest and mobile

"The Good Lord is an excellent reference, but without a phone number..."

'Let's have some fun -- let's make them responsible for their own actions.'

"Wow, …. who does your voice-overs?"

"Sorry. I'm molting."

'Oh, dear! — your baptismal certificate was never notarized!'

'You mean I have to MENTOR, too?'

'That's my slogan, you lousy thieveing creep!'

God Shows His Love In Many Ways...

'What the...? How the heck did that get in there? Oh, well, I guess it will have to do.'

Never fails. Stay in all week, not one call. Step out for an hour to preach...

Keep Christ in Xmas.

"Heaven is currently unattended, if you wish to leave your prayers at the sound of the tone...they will be answered."