Distance Daters Pillows

The Face Mask

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The Science of Love

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

'It was love at first sight, although he was very pixilated and I was out of focus'

"Sure, it's more efficient. But I still miss shooting the arrows."

Online Dating

Kissable Frogs in Your Area

'Of all the women who responded to my dating profile, you had the best emoticon.'

Sally and Doug had met online and were proving to be very compatible...

'I was attracted to you but your online photo, but now that I've seen you in High-Def...'

"Ooo... she sounds nice... 'I enjoy burying myself in the sand and sideways walks on the beach.'"

'Okay, but not in person -- I prefer on-line dating.'

"That guy I just met is already texting me pictures of his plumage."

"Don't take this the wrong way, Howard, but I'd like to go back to having an on-line relationship."

Today's love

'Long distance romances in the twenty first century.'

'Take this stick-drive and open the file 'John's Emotional Baggage'. It'll save a lot of time.'

"Romeo,Romeo. Are you online,Romeo"

'Speed dating really works! Our first date was Friday, we married on Saturday, and now I'm happily single again.'

Financially Secure Romantic with sufficient fire in belly seeks damsel in distress...

"Can you tell me the story again about how you swiped right on Dad?"

We met online.

"What do you mean asking you to marry me via text wasn't romantic? Did you see the emoji with hearts for eyes I attached?"

"You new personality that you downloaded off the Internet makes you irresistible."

You are not forgotten!

Online Dating for Dummies

"I dreamed last night that I had a job within walking distance."

"Wow! That guy is REALLY good at 'Speed Dating!'"

"So, do you walk the talk? Replete the tweet? Sext the text?"

'That must be my computer date.'

'Because only men can believe than 1 inch equals a mile.'

"...and if anyone here suspects that the algorithm that put these two together might be flawed, speak now..."

'We met online.'

Friday night was always sext night.

"AI can now scan dating sites and find your best match."