Disorderly Scholar T-Shirts

College student cleans messy dorm room littered with clothes with leafsnow blower

"Have you been on the moon again, young man?"

Postgraduates A group of posts on their way to class.

The Bookworm

'When I asked you to do research for your assignment, I meant the library not on Google!'

"This statement from your headmaster says that you can easily get a good degree...your bank manager says you can't."

"Graduation day at kite flying school."

"There's the pressure from my public, naturally, as well as the pressure from my publisher, my agent, and all that. But the real pressure comes from that devil inside that makes me different from other men, that makes me a writer. But, of course, you know all about pressure, grinding out those papers at Sarah Lawrence."

Nervous Student

'He was working on a theory of entropy, and developed a severe case of it himself.'

"If robots can replace workers, then they can replace students. So I created one for me. Now I can stay home all day and play video games."

'Dr. Nackschmerz has a very logical mind.' - 'Yes - in contrast to his body.'

Sign by school library reads: 'Passing Lane'

"He's in first grade. He'll get to Zs."

I hate group projects

"It's a helmet cam. This way I won't miss out on anything if I fall asleep."

"Nice try, but learning by osmosis is not a thing."

"You will never get your math homework done that way mister!"

"Why can I only cross 'right' or 'wrong'? What about 'I don't care', 'I don't give a damn' or 'How should I know'?"

Seven Deadly Sins. Anger. Envy. Covetousness. Gluttony. Lust. Sloth. Pride. After you've successfully resisted the other six deadly sins, it's really hard not to be proud.

'She will not call on me, she will not call on me, she. . .'

'Things couldn't be better.'

'My mom doesn't really respect my privacy. She just can't stand to come in my room.'

They're brothers. One is very intelligent. The other is a baseball pitcher who constantly cheats. They both have a lot on the ball!

The SAT test can wear you down.

"My report is on a man ahead of his time: Email Zola."

"A clean desk is the Devil's workshop, that's my motto."

'If I major in criminology, can I get life experience credit?'

'You'll never get anywhere in life with a diligent attitude like that!'

The 'I'd rather be fishing' prayer.

'I can't guarantee that giving up smiling, drinking and sex will make you live longer, but it will certainly SEEM much longer. . .'

State University Research Lab into the Jitters and HebbieJeebies.

"A book is like a big meal. It puts you to sleep."

'Boys spell better than girls.' 'Yes, but their figures are not as good.'

"You must be so excited about meeting people."