Discipline Dynamos Mugs

"Right! Let's break for lunch!. . . . Well don't just stand on ceremony!"

"Russ had a novel published two hours ago and has a children's book coming out in 20 minutes."

CEO with SEO

Cossack dancers

"If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to far, go together." - African proverb.

Considering she started here as an office temp she's done quite well.

'She's in training.'

Engineer on the move.

Boxes marked 'In', 'Out' and 'How did this end up on my desk?'

"Jeez, these things are hot."

"Before we decide that SEO is dead, can someone tell me what SEO is?"

GPs could be forced to switch IT systems onto new NHS digital contract

"We'll have to eat out tonight - I misplaced the can opener."

Computer tycoon, 'It's that nerd-do-well from next door,'

"He's here early and he stays late. I don't know if he's dedicated or just homeless."

Produce Academy. The lemons were all sent to detention again today? Yeah, they're always tarty.

Tour de France champ Fausto Coppi

"Unfortunately your Twitter has been hacked. Fortunately it has been hacked by someone much cooler and funnier than you."

'We've finished the dishes, Miss. Jenny washes, I wiped, and Susan picked up all the pieces.'

The auto-update demons attack-again."

Man with Ironing burns on shirt - "How are things going at home Robert?"

"We're already wondering what her legacy might be."

"What's wrong, hon? You haven't touched my food."

'It's hard to believe that at home, she's a mommy.'

Sports Agency. In my work as a sports agent, I told this athlete she needs to improve if she wants to be well-known. Ironically, in diving you become famous by not making a splash! I got this marathon competitor a sponsorship so he can focus on training. He's going to take the money and run! This sprinter will earn a bonus if he sets a record. Oh, going after some fast money! And I made this guy agree to give me an extra slice of his pay if I negotiated a great contract for him which I di

"A toothbrush with a DVD player?" "Yeah, now she brushes for half an hour."

"The logo needs to represent procellousness. Your design says pusillanimity, at best."

Politically Correct Dictionaries

'After scraping my tongue, flossing my teeth, brushing my teeth, whitening my teeth and gargling, I'm hungry all over again!'

"Look, I'm really having trouble with my computer. I need it to work and I need it now...and your fancy schmancy jargon isn't helping much."

My name's Troy, and I'll be your serve tonight. My name's Fred and I'll be talking way too loudly about my colon. I'm still learning my name, and I'll be screaming for no good reason.

'Rabbit stew again?' ( MAGICIANS HAT ON STOVE)

'I'm afraid your daughter has a severe case of texter's neck and I see some serious tweeter's thumbs developing, as well!'

"You keep telling me to back up my computer. Well, I can't back it up anymore. It's all the way back to the wall."

'Your teacher says he finds it impossible to teach you.'