Discipline Advocate T-Shirts

"Now, about your room." "Aw, mom." "Don't 'aw mom' me. A clean and orderly room promotes discipline." "But ..." "But nothing. Believe me, you'll thank me later. And another thing ..."

Your Message on Your T-Shirt: 'Do As You Are Told!'

'Did you drop a fly ball? Did you?! Bad! Baaaad!'

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

Enhanced Pedophilia Interrogation Techniques

"There was no other choice, Mom. It was a double dog dare."

Inclusive speech

A business that thinks alike...sinks alike.

"That recruitment algorithm we’ve been using, I think we need to revisit it!"

"So you kiss me and I turn into a prince? No thanks, sweetie, I'm gay. I'm already a queen."

Slavery Reparations

Grounded

'Our goal is to stress di-versity while remaining a uni-versity.'

'We'd like to form a support group for homework anxiety.'

"Sorry, we don't hire people with a history of whistle blowing."

'Don't be so dramatic and get into my office!'

'There have been a few niggling little concerns expressed about the lack of diversity in the supreme court.'

A man with Dwarfism is reading Little Women.

-...And we don't discriminate against people of colour. -I've been on the sunbed!

'Coulda, woulda, and definitely shoulda.'

Child is read a book titled 'People' by a parrot.

"Of course I believe in diversity. Harlan, here, is an endangered species."

Becoming The Good Boy They Say You Are

'But, Mom, being good just doesn't work for me.'

'What a bunch of control freaks!'

'Should-do and shouldn't-do sound a lot alike.'

Verbal Orders

"People are always banging on about the advantages of 'so-called' diversity."

'But, dear -- Lady Godiva is part of my diversity program!'

Science Snobs

'Oh, you'll love working here. Nobody treats you any differently just becuase of your age, race, or gender.'

"SUPERintendent! What kind of powers do you have?"

"I'm not going to shoot the messenger, but I'm also not going to renew his grant."

'Don't come down until your thirty five.'

Statue of Liberty holds a sign up reads: Who are We?