Disaster Prevention Fan Pillows

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

Desert Island Mishap

'Well for crying out loud, why didn't you do that when I asked you?!!'

"Shall I kiss it better?"

'It's an old work injury.'

Fire Assembly Point

Japan Disaster: Japanese fighting Nuclear Grim Reaper.

421AD...north east Italy

Broken down ambulance means horse and man have to carry stretcher

'Stand back!...She's cleared out three local stores in the last year.'

"Lollipop man, dear.. what lollipop man?"

Some just ain't cut out for wind farmin'.

Head in the sand.

A shark swims into a desert island.

'Any worldly advice?' 'Yep. Don't get up too quickly.'

'Are you crazy! The nest is made of dry grass and twigs: Smoking is a massive fire harzard!'

"Iron Chef, my ass!"

"Quick... STOP, DROP & ROLL!"

Welcome to the middle class Jer$ey $hore!'

"I hope we haven't come at a bad time."

Betty liked to use safety glasses

Flood Ready Cows

'I told you not to play with matches.'

"Easy does it, Ralph."

"I'm looking for a sense of security and piece of mind in a short-recoil-operated, single-action semiautomatic."

"I know they say a bad workman always blames his tools but - a faulty plumbline!!"

"Henry's always on call!"

Keep Apart 2 Chevrons

"I had a little fender bender on the way home. The fender is in 6th Ave., the bumper on the 5th ave, the door on 4th and the hood around the corner."

'Oh they needed a light from you, did they? For the last time, don't ever play with matches!'