Dirt Decoration Enthusiast Pillows

Rally dust decorating $100 - Hand wash $5

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

Happy Holidays from Sanitary Claus!

Decorated officer - 'And these are for keeping my pants up.'

Ironing day.

'Maybe he has some sort of mystic attachment to the soil.'

'I lost a fight with a mud puddle.'

"I know it is of this earth...."

"I'm cleaning a little already, because the cleaning lady will be here soon!"

"Sheez. I hope they like pictures of dirt."

Goddess of Fertility garden feature

Gary Basks in the glow of a fifteen-minute window with no empty cardboard boxes in the house.

"I spent the whole day cleaning the house. My cleaning lady comes tomorrow and I didn't want her seeing things like that!"

"No, I don't look in the mirror. I look in the soap."

'It may not be your feng shui, but it's my feng shui.'

'We think he has a future in politics.'

'I never thought my dirt would turn on me like this.'

"You told Pastor Bob about my room, didn't you?"

'Parents are so inconsistent. They spend all day avoiding soil loss and all night promoting it.'

"I'll wear any kind of dirt, but I prefer a rich loam with lots of humus."

'I thought this was supposed to be clean fill dirt!'

'I'm not making a mess, Mom - I'm becoming one with the Earth!'

How Gary got his groove back.

User friendly soil.

Spring cleaning.

"Okay dad, I'll clean my room. . . you didn't have to make a federal case out of it!"

"My mom used to be an excellent housekeeper, but I put a stop to that."

Super glue hoovering

"Your sweaters go in the drawer, your shoes go on the shelf, and you go in this nifty cubby here."

"There's always someone who goes over the top with their rooftop decorations."

"Good afternoon. Feng-shui consultation bureau."

Lawn Furniture/Yawn Furniture.

"This de-cluttering has gone too far dear."

'Never, Ever...open the glove compartment in your car.'

'We were mud wrestling.'