Diploma Connoisseur T-Shirts

'Thanks, I started collecting diplomas when I was seven.'

'No ice.'

Join me in a Martini?

Archimedes statue with a lever

"... And this one needs a shot of vodka."

"Wait, those crunchy, cheesy little fish thingies are free?!"

Mendelssohn Finds His Inspiration

'Not even close man - easy listening's around the corner.'

"Well, it's disappointing: Young Master seems to use the term 'best friend' for anybody who pays him the slightest attention..."

"You know what they say, time flies when you're having rum!"

'Would you care to see our wine list, water list, soda list, tea list, coffee list, single malt scotch list, or beer list?'

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

'The way I see it, drinking is its own reward.'

'No Fred, this one is one me!'

'Fried chickens.'

"Hey, would you mind taking a quick sculpture of me and my family?"

'I'm on the short degree course... hell of a lot to pack into one year!'

Pub restrooms; Thugs - Thugettes

"Some Debussy, Igor."

'Fill her up. No ice - it takes up valuable space!'

Music Student

"I'm sure you've heard of foodies - he's a drinkie."

Sir Edward Elgar

Next Round Indicator

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

"On second thoughts, I'll have it stirred, not shaken."

Brahms and Liszt at Christmas!

Man frozen in portrait pose.

'Fred is a social conservative -- he believes in slow food and heavy beer.'

S**t Threw a Goose

"How awful! - was he a band, or an orchestra conductor?"

'We are now entering sombre hour, happy hour has finished.'

Trappist talk show.

'Well, it was just a first draft.'

"Do you want a drink or do you need a drink ? We're very busy...."