Dinner Ditherer Gifts

"Can you just recommend something? Neither of us can possibly focus long enough to read a menu."

Counting ribs

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

"You owe me five bucks."

'I know! It's what I had last night for dinner.'

'When you asked me over for a home-cooked meal, I assumed you'd be making it.'

"Let me get this, but keep in mind that you'll pay for it in other, more subtle ways later on."

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

The Shakespeares Dine Out.

'We're going to look pretty stupid if it's not a Michelin star.'

'Nobody goes there anymore.' 'Because it's too crowded.'

"I forgot my wallet. Do you know 'Folsom Prison Blues'?"

"Would you mind telling me why you keep hitting a scary-music sound bite every time you pick up your steak knife?"

"Meditation is too hard. How do you keep one thought in your mind for this long?"

'I'll be late for dinner - a shelf fell on me.'

'And just how much is silver going for a troy ounce these days?'

"You ordered mammoth again?"

Humble beginnings of the International House of Pancakes

"The social conservative in me tells me to pay for dinner, but the fiscal conservative thinks we should split it."

'I hate them too. Listen, would you like to go out sometime? Dinner maybe? We could complain about the service.'

'I wouldn't say you're boring, Chuck, but you're the only person I know who records The Weather Channel.'

"Soup?"

"Sure we could just print out the specials, but the chef doesn't want to leave a paper trail."

'Now where did I put my knitting needles?'

"Hey, guess what we're having for dinner tomorrow."

Waiter: 'Here you are ma'am.Your Walled-off salad.' a waiter serving a woman a Waldorf salad surrounded by a brick wall

"When you say 'the same', do you mean worse or better?"

"I'll wait, my wife's in the loo."

'Will you stop going BAAAAA every time I eat a piece of lamb!'

Dîner Transportable - plus dessert.

'Charles, what did I tell you about bringing your work home?'

'Forget about National Security for a second... if I'm not home in an hour for dinner, there's going to be some REAL FIREWORKS!'

"Do you two need a little more time?"

"Because of the war can we split this?"

The PARTISAN CAFE: "For or against section?"