Dinner Delivery Devotee Pillows

Even before we began to order in, my dad was always keen to skip the dishes!

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

LAY ZEE FUK

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

'I'll have you know sir, that we used the finest columbian coffee beans in that dishwater.'

Hello. I'm Ferdinand. I'll be monitoring the levels of bull at your table this evening. Menu. Menu.

'I can't wait 'til hunting is googling and gathering is calling out for delivery.'

I'd like to take this menu and shove it where the sun don't shine. But I'll settle for the omelette & hash browns...

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

"She'll have a Shirley Temple, and I'll have a Shirley Temple's mother."

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

Newton had actually discovered gravity at a family dinner in his early childhood.

Waitress to church leader: 'It's your daily bread, Pastor. Remember? You ordered the prayer breakfast.'

Diner

"I'll have the egg-yellow omelette."

"Do you remember ordering 1,345 cans of tuna?"

Heavy meals on wheels

"Hmmm ... perhaps a pinot noir less spilly?"

I used to eat plenty of natural foods, but then I found out that most people die of natural causes.

'...and one 'death by chocolate', Sir.'

"The waiter said he wouldn't recommend the octopus, so what do you order? The octopus."

'How would you like your toast?'

'The braised toucan was fine...although I found the bill a little large.'

Waiter: 'I'm not really a waiter, I'm an actor. I'll act like I'm waiting on you.'

'I can't have you spending all of your money on fancy restaurants like this, Jeff.'

Emily's Slow Food Restaurant.

"This IS a chicken fried steak!"

"A votre sante!"

Dave's Hamburger Shop

'Would you like me to wipe the cup with my finger or would you prefer Rover here licking it clean?'

'Would you folks care for some fresh maple syrup on your pancakes?'

"Is everything ok with your Emile?"

'...And an extra packet of crackers! It's our Anniversary!'

"I'll just have a small salad. . . say 400 pounds of fresh river vegetation."

"Take your time. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day."