Dining In The Dark T-Shirts

"I've burnt the roast...Turn down the restaurant lighting a touch!"

'I sent out for everything.'

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

Come dine with me!

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

Grace For Flies

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

Sloaney Pony.

"I love this place—its food, its ambience, and its political goals."

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

LAY ZEE FUK

"Stephen and I are today's special."

"Just bring me something that's going to look good on social media."

'You wanna play another round?' 'Sure....tender, another round!'

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

Life is for the birds.

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

'I'll have the crab cake, and he'll have the crabby cake.'

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"Behold! As I transform this family size frozen lasagna into a meal for one."

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

Cutaway view of Ocean liner.

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

"The fish sticks here are very good."

Diner.

"Even the waiters here are organic."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

'A cheeky red?'

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

"You do like octopus?"

"This place is one of New York's best-kept secrets."

"Vintage? What would you like it to be?"