Dining Fanatic Pillows

'...And the sooner you shift this sign the better!'

Counting ribs

"Stephen and I are today's special."

'I'll have the crab cake, and he'll have the crabby cake.'

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

Life is for the birds.

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

'It's the chef's special. His wife just had a baby.'

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

"Tonight, perhaps Mrs. Lewis would prefer this quiet little table for two from which to send back her entrée?"

'Needs salt!'

'Mom's Diner, Turkey Sandwich Special, $2.00.'

'Now that's what I call a kebab... a skewer with whole pies!'

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

'He doesn't ask for a menu... he asks for an estimate!'

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

Harsh Mellows.

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

A shop selling "Ice-cold Vodka" in 31 flavors.

Important Food Groups

Benihana style of cooking.

Kitchen Kapers

"Which wine would you pair with the complimentary bread and butter?"

Next time, a larger tip for the server and less free tax advice.

"Yes, we have blue cheese. Do you want it in electric, sky or navy blue?"

Ice Cream Dreams.

"Your soup is delicious. The broth perfectly compliments the font."

"I hope you won't repent afterwards, Vicar, It's a devilishly hot vindaloo!"

The Streets - Night

"Have you decided on what you'd like to have?"

"Spoiler alert! If you read the specials, you'll find out the Chef's Surprise!"