Diner Nostalgist Pillows

Man sees eatery, 'Mom's Cyber Cafe', below it reads, 'Formerly Mom's Diner'.

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

Diner.

'I'll have you know sir, that we used the finest columbian coffee beans in that dishwater.'

I'd like to take this menu and shove it where the sun don't shine. But I'll settle for the omelette & hash browns...

"Hi, I'm Pop!"

Waitress to church leader: 'It's your daily bread, Pastor. Remember? You ordered the prayer breakfast.'

'Who gets the decaf?'

Diner

"I'll have the egg-yellow omelette."

"The after-dinner mint is the boss's idea. I think it's superfluous."

'The food is great, but it's embarrassing the way she always insists on burping you.'

I used to eat plenty of natural foods, but then I found out that most people die of natural causes.

'If you order...You can digest it in...'

"The Knuckle Sandwich is good."

'How would you like your toast?'

'One placebo or two, doctor?'

Choice hellhole

"The usual."

"It's my family's special recipe, passed down through generations on the cream cheese package."

"This IS a chicken fried steak!"

Dave's Hamburger Shop

"A votre sante!"

'Would you like me to wipe the cup with my finger or would you prefer Rover here licking it clean?'

'Cook is a musician. Improvises. Never makes the same thing twice.'

'I can't have you spending all of your money on fancy restaurants like this, Jeff.'

"Welcome to the Short Staffed Cafe serving food like your grandma cooked. Is your grandma busy? We really need a cook."

'Today's special is yesterday's left-overs.'

'Would you care for a drink while your food is being defrosted?'

"Just a drop."

A train's dining car is a diner.

De ja vu soup - 'It was yesterday's 'soup of the day'.'