Digital Sports Strategist Pillows

'Good. Now just click on 'play'...'

The MBA Draft

Old navy veteran 3rd base coach

I can't decide. Should I go to soccer camp 3 weeks in a row? Or soccer, then baseball then lacrosse camp? 3 soccers. Isn't overspecializing at his age bad? Possibly. But 3 different sports means�buying 3 different sets of expensive equipment. Right, He does have a mean corner kick.

"I don't believe I've missed a single sign since you made the switch to Power Point."

"I can always tell when Philip is working on family finances. A 'cursor' appears on both sides of the computer screen."

Eldrow

"To be clear, I said I want your 'A' game, not your 'Eh?' game."

Perils of the double play.

"Ok, Ok! The ball wasn't out!"

'You should have taken up the game earlier.'

The Other Cooperstown

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

'Unbelievable, these guys brought a ringer.'

'I hate bloody football! It's just a bunch of over-rated, overpaid nancy boys kicking a b-' - 'Genuine football fans may leave work early to avoid missing the start of important World Cup fixtures.' - 'C'mon England!'

'At least we don't have to accomplish anything in order to go to a bowl game.'

"I love fast break business success."

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

"Hack back with all you've got!"

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

"When you put on the uniform, you surrender a part of yourself."

"If you think it's tough at this level, kid, wait until you get into calculus."

"Get used to verifications. In the court of the internet, you are presumed a robot until proven otherwise."

'You are dreaming the impossible team.'

"Fellas, I invited Max here to give us a fresh, millennial take on how to get out of the inning."

"They play union in heaven... where do they play football?"

"The good news is I used AI to fill in my March tournament bracket and I won the whole thing. The bad news is AI has become self aware and wants the prize money."

'Our gymnasium is being repaired so we played sports games on our computers.'

'Every team needs a role player. And your role on this team, Bill, is to sit at that desk and crunch numbers.'

'Blimey, boss - that's a bit revolutionary, isn't it?'

Baseball Clubhouse Pranks

'Are you blind ref?'

'...and if you guys keep screwing up, I'm gonna have to start kicking some butt!'

'..The wolves have got the sheep pinned against their own 1-yard line again!'

"Baseball is way too boring - so, we're doing one inning, winner takes all, everybody go home early and live their lives."