Digital Socialite Gifts

Social networking.

'IT support? Help!!! I just lost 28.743 friends!!!'

Man in pub puts on coat, saying to work colleagues: 'Must dash ... I want to spend some time on my social-networking sites.'

A socially distanced queue

friendsdisconnected.com

'We've not met but I'm familiar with your online profile.'

'I'm leaving you Hector, I found a new best friend in the internet chat room.'

Squitter! 'Thx 4 the follow-through'

''Whassup? Got no mates ugly?' - ha ha very funny.'

"It's lunchtime! Have you finished saying 'Good Morning' on your WhatsApp Groups?"

Clique Bait

A sign outside a bookstore reads: "Meet the people in the bookstore cafe staring at their laptops 2-4 p.m."

Seniors Snooker Tournament.

'Alas, poor Yorick, I knew you well. But dude, you're creeping me out, so I gotta un-friend you!'

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

'A Ball at the Mansion House'

Cellphone Islands

"Another flue shot, Larry.

Children's Party

A little sharpener before dinner, darling?

"'Mr. Evans,' she said to me with that adorable smile, 'I think you're the nicest boy in the entire old-boy network.'"

"He's so into social media that he's become anti-social."

'Look at him with another business model on his arm.'

Online marriage ceremony.

Rod was unimpressed with the party - Sure, he was surrounded by bikini-clad lovelies, there was free champagne and a 20-foot jelly, but much to his chagrin, there was a distinct lack of cheese and pineapple chunks.

"Whoa! Wrong bar?"

"Bob choked on a spoon of caviar while he was on skiing vacation in St. Moritz."

Working from home to-do list.

Follow God On Twitter

"Happy thanksgiving!"

'If you're worried what to say you do for a living at your reunion, just tell them you recently bought a large stake in a local brewery.'

A day at the races

'Everyone here likes a big band, right?'

Computer Head

'Ah, beer! And the bringer of beer!'