Digital Privacy Comedian Pillows

'If you don't want Google to make public your colonoscopy, check this box and your ass will be pixilated.'

Knight in armor is using his jousting pole as a selfie stick.

"Between you, Alexa, and Siri, I'm just in a house surrounded by women who think they know everything."

'Trust me. Those shells have always been wireless.'

"....and then it turned out that the e-mail I ignored that I got from the Nigerian bank offering me £200 million was REAL!"

Presidential surveillance ass!"

STRIP Hambone: Humanoid computers

"I don't think I can be truly happy unless I have more passwords."

"It's a baby. Federal regulations prohibit our mentioning its race, age, or gender."

'As far as we can tell, the system went down because someone stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.'

'Some hackers have broken into the system. It goes in as molten steel, and it comes out as chicken gumbo soup.'

The benefit of an old-fashioned newspaper.

'Did you hear? We have a new slogan: Artisan-crafted wine made the old-world way.'

21st century Safe Sex - protecting against face-recognition software.

'I think its being tapped.'

'Sorry, sweetie -- they're not that kind of cookies.'

"The Internet puts the world at your finger tips."

"We’re having privacy concerns with your omniscience."

"He's our back-up if our computers fail."

"Re-calculating, arrive at your final destination in six...five...four..."

Nerd emergency: tongue stuck to frozen PC screen.

"We understand you're not happy with our privacy policy."

What's that? A car phone. All I need now is a car.

"On the bright side, the NSA is done tracking you."

Man on Island.

Man looking at a vending machine with a hand sticking out of it and a sign that reads "Put'er there buddy".

"You know, the doorway is never going to get popular until somebody invents the door."

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