Digital Disciples Pillows

"And do please remember to visit our online confession service."

"The time has come to reflect and ask ourselves... 'what would Jesus tweet?'"

"We have a new app that does sin to atonement conversion."

"For your penance, text me 400 Hail Marys."

'Does it come on Disc?'

"Our father who art at www.heaven.com..."

Benedict XVI joins 'Facebook' and instructs his clergy to use all forms of modern technology to reach a wider audience.

'He googles you. That's how God knows everything about you.'

'For more details or to comment, please visit my faithbook page.'

"Ok - now press, 'saved'."

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

'I've decided to centralize my operations. Everything will be in my ipad.'

Moses on the web

'It seems to work, I couldn't afford a blackberry!'

"In the same of the phone, the tablet, and the desktop computer."

"You've got computer-breath."

Person with eyes focused on a computer screen.

Addicted to Facebook...lost internet connection.

STRIP Hambone: Businessman in hospital with his computer

God's Phone

"I'll never forget you."

'Who said romance is dead? I just downloaded a screensaver with red roses and chocolates for your PC!'

"I'll be glad when this is over and Sarah can be herself again."

"I've got a better view on my smart phone."

"And always remember...If you're going to be sick, always do it on the carpet. It's more absorbent."

"I really don't care what yours says. My weather app says rain for 40 days and 40 nights. I think you should probably go with that, Noah."

"I have an app for that."

"Why would I want to see anything that far away from my phone?"

"If we could all turn to page 387, turn off your iPods and repeat after me?"

"Its's a beautiful day. Why don't you play outside?"

"Amen. Thanks everyone, oh and don't forget to subscribe!"

"Only three hundred and sixty-seven followers? Maria's not an asset to the abbey."

'No, Father, they're not praying. They're texting.'

Follow God On Twitter

"Please turn on your cell phones."