Digital Daredevil Gifts

'Besides delivering never-ending eternal suffering,how do you want to be portrayed to your customers?' - Web Design.

Roger's computer crashes.

'My new browser is so fast I have to take motion sickness pills.'

Click - 'View basket' - 'click' - 'Proceed to checkout.' - 'Con't untick box if you don't not want to not recieve e-mail marketing.' - 'Calm, Peel. Calm...' -

"Good heavens William, what have you downloaded off the internet this time?"

"The good news is a major company has noticed our website. The bad news is they're accusing us of copyright infringement."

'I wasn't talking on my cellphone. . . I was playing a videogame.'

Don Z. And His User-Friendly Apartment

"Wow - he can walk on hot coals without even posting that he's walking on hot coals."

"The I.T. guy gave it to me."

The Texter

"Yes dear, I know excessive mobile use is dangerous, that's not why I'm calling."

"...This computer will self-destruct in 10 seconds"

"It's a new mobile game where you can't take your eyes off the screen. You score points by bumping into things."

Driving using mobile phone

'Now I know why the strategy guide warned against entering the 5th stage. Awesome!'

'Oh, b***ocks! I've left my mobile phone at home.' - 'People will think I'm avoiding their calls.' - '' - 'Later, at home...' - 'You have no new messages.' - 'Oh.' -

'That's why I never text while jogging.'

'I got an F today - for improper interfacing with my computer.'

"I just need to send one quick e-mail then I'm all yours."

'I figured out how to download a bike off the Internet. But, I think I had the resolution set too low.'

"I just hacked your company's website. NOW do I get the computer security job?"

"I think that may have been one software update too far!"

"I always just check the box without reading that stuff."

"Nice picture, Jones! You look great in Ladies' underwear!"

"Mrs. Beetle, Marty's screen is frozen, again."

Passing the Tablet

"Did you leave your phone in airplane mode again?"

"My name is Alice, I'm age 78. I want to buy some cocaine for my lovers' birthday. Can you help me to enter the darknet?"

"Jim had to know what happens when you turn off your computer while it's updating."

It's only an email, what harm can it do?

"A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer."

"Gosh, Paul, I doubt if I'll be much help with your problem... I know just enough about computers to be dangerous!"

"When you're done cyberattacking, your PB&J, with crustd cut off, is waiting."

"Ah, I've got an app for this."