Digital Content Manager Gifts

"You will be the man responsible for our digital content."

"Oh, Jeff, you swore this wasn't a podcast."

'There's nothing on.'

Proud of herself for "never owning a tv" Emily watches eight episodes of a mediocre tv show on her laptop while in bed.

"I've given up on the novel. There's more money in writing inspirational memes."

Lies/Damned Lies/Social Media

"Where have you been? This content's not going to create itself."

"Lori, I can’t talk right now — I’m right in the middle of updating my dog’s Facebook page."

'We no longer look at résumés. We go straight to your Facebook page.'

"'C' is for free CONTENT!"

"No, I don't play. I just watch people play on the internet."

"Welcome back to the We Were Bored and Had Nothing Else To Do podcast."

"Having our team all work on the same page has been a lot more difficult since our company has gone paperless."

"Google gets thousands of requests each day to erase links. Most of them seem to go back to my website."

This is Pandora, our new Content Manager.

"Our website design could be described as "organic"... in the sense that people often compare it to poop."

"Ever wonder where all those cat videos come from?"

Nobody's reding our company blog,we need you to have sex with Mrs Miggins so that we can spice it up!

'I guess this is what we get for going to a discount web-page designer.'

"Yeah, but this is a cat on a skateboard being arrested by a cop with a tattoo of the Confederate flag!"

"Yes, you did close some of your tabs. However, you still have 1,894 open. You're a tab hoarder."

I started my own Youtube channel. What's it about? Well, there are already too many stupid-stunt-and-prank channels, and too many holier-than-thou-independent-news-analysis channels. But get this: There were absolutely zero holier-than-thou-stupid-stunt-and-prank-analysis channels. Probably a reason for that. My first hard-hitting post reveals how the inauthenticity of the "Mario Kart" prank is driving away Millennials.

Spam traps on mobiles

"Still no offers - sometimes I think I'm the only one using this site."

Better Living Through Technology

"After seeing the benefits of web analytics, Amy hoped to learn something by attaching cookies to customers who visited her store."

What passes today for 'nose in a book'.

"I can't wait to post this."

Social Networks.

"Opportunity came knocking once, but I missed it. I was expecting a tweet."

You.com

"I'll be answering that question and many more in next week's webinar."

"Hi guys, and welcome to my channel!"

The Influencer from Hamelin

Woman on TV says: 'Remember, you can download the best bits of this show as a video podcast, if you really have no life.'