Dietary Debaters Gifts

Vegetarian Nightmare

"So what happens to our BILLIONS of poor BACTERIA when we die, especially if we're cremated? That's HARD CHEESE is it, you VEGAN!?"

"Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Finally, I cracked."

'May future generations forgive you for eating that sausage...'

"Daddy, you have to flatten this curve."

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

Get your no-turkey recipes here! Eco club. Go veggie for T-day! No thanks! I like turkey, sausage, stuffing, creamed onions with bacon and mincemeat pie. I figured as much. How can you tell? Gut check. That's my gut reaction, too.

"That's it - your diet starts tomorrow"

"I eat a totally plant-based diet and I still can't lose weight."

'Apparently the nutrients and the additives cancel each other out.'

"Why did God make fruit if he also made candy?"

'School of nutrition - as of today: Butter, good...'

Adam and Eve - Food scares

"Like you, I'm a bit of a glutton, but I need to monitor my food intake otherwise I could be too heavy to fly..."

"Yes, I know that chocolate comes from the cocoa Bean...but that does NOT count as a vegetable!"

'You are talking about health? Ha! My cig does not have calories, fat, cholesterol, carbohydrates and sugar!'

"What do you have that justifies its calories?"

"Steak for breakfast, steak for lunch, steak for dinner. . . you can't stop evolution!"

"Ambitions... to eat, drink and be merry."

"I just want to know if I'm healthy enough for bacon?"

"Beans count as healthy vegetables but jelly beans don't? Not faaaiiir!!!"

"Never eat anything you can't lift over your head."

'The vegetarians are the smug-looking ones...'

'I wouldn't call myself a vegetarian, but I don't eat dead animals either.'

That's not quite what I meant by a 'balanced diet'..

'I have a hard time believing that fast food causes obesity.'

"How come there's a forbidden fruit but not a forbidden vegetable?"

"It has a cream base because we hate you."

'I know it's my third doughnut, but it's okay. I'm using the Pilates method of dunking.'

'Get back! Get back! Or so help me...I'll eat it!'

"Papi, we've decided we want nothing but salads...and hamburgers...for every meal."

"We're wolves, Jessica. We eat veal."

"Moving to a chair to eat three times a day really isn't 'doing sit-ups!'"

'You need a more balanced diet.'

The Atkins Diet.