Diet Resolution Pillows

'Doctor said to burn more calories.'

'Letting you pick up the check will help you stay on your diet.'

Soup of the month.

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

"This could be the year someone actually goes up there."

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

The discovery of asparagus.

'Good news. Your cholesterol has stayed the same, but the research findings have changed.'

"I'd like to start the 'Wellness at Work' training by offering you some guidance on diet and exercise."

"This year I resolve to embrace change."

"Statins. I got statins. Who needs statins?"

"They say we destroy plants – such as potatoes, corn and carrots – and they're boycotting us. They're fruitarians."

"You need to lose 20 cable channels."

'Dorothy - we're not in the health food section anymore.'

"My New Year's resolution is to lose thirty-eight thousand pounds."

'Vegetarian is an old Indian word which means bad hunter.'

Shawn considered himself a vegetarian by proxy.

Looking at magnetic polarity one understands why an apple a day keeps the doctor away.

Macho Vegetarian

"You won’t need refills."

'I'm writing my New Year's resolutions.' - 'I resolve to finish everything that I start.'

This year, Barry resolved to try new things and take more chances - starting tomorrow.

Cathy decides to remain standing on the scale until she loses weight.

No matter what I do, I still look more like a 'before' picture than an 'after' picture.

'Remember, chew every bite 32 times.'

'Most, yes, but they're not all carcinogenic!'

"How am I supposed to trust my gut when it can't even handle a little dairy?"

'According to Dr Alvin McDowell, everything that was good for you is now bad for you!'

"Some doctor that guy is - He's OBSESSED with diet and exercise!"

"Frankly Mr. Watkins - all your current health issues are down to you rubbish diet..."

'You're eating too much roughage.'

“Children hate me.”

'Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun.'