Diet Discourse Fan Prints

"Lookin' good, Frosty!"

"Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Finally, I cracked."

"Daddy, you have to flatten this curve."

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

'I've found a way to improve on light beer!'

"That's it - your diet starts tomorrow"

"Give me your metabolism! Now!"

You are what you eat (Nuts).

'School of nutrition - as of today: Butter, good...'

Political Analysis

"Yes, I know that chocolate comes from the cocoa Bean...but that does NOT count as a vegetable!"

'You are talking about health? Ha! My cig does not have calories, fat, cholesterol, carbohydrates and sugar!'

"What do you have that justifies its calories?"

"Steak for breakfast, steak for lunch, steak for dinner. . . you can't stop evolution!"

'I want to lose weight, Doctor.' - 'Eat less, then.' - 'I need it to be more complicated than that.' - 'Why?' - 'How can I justify failing if it's that simple, eh?!' - 'Gah. He's breaking me...' -

'I have a hard time believing that fast food causes obesity.'

Urp! Homo Eructus.

"It killed on social media yet you say it's horrible?" "Lousy is lousy."

"It has a cream base because we hate you."

'I know it's my third doughnut, but it's okay. I'm using the Pilates method of dunking.'

"Moving to a chair to eat three times a day really isn't 'doing sit-ups!'"

"I'm the 'Before' in diet ads."

"Can you get on the scale please? I'm on a diet and need to monitor my food intake..."

'Get back! Get back! Or so help me...I'll eat it!'

The Atkins Diet.

'You need a more balanced diet.'

Regular ground beef, irregular ground beef.

"I'm a big devotee of fasting."

"I refuse to eat vegan food. I'm an omnivore, me!"

"You're not being reasonable Darling: the doctor has told you not to snack between meals..."

'Hey, I just noticed something. So you know what you get if you cover the 'c' in potato chips? Potato hips, isn't that funny?'

"I call it the 'Fasting diet'. Also known as the 'Where's all the food gone?!!' diet."