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Prisoner stuck behind zebra stripes.

The Department of Really Stupid Ideas: 'Most people think they just appear out of thin air! But the truth is, there's a great deal of very hard work involved!'

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

"Do you want to pretend to be a doctor and I'll pretend to be a hotshot civil litigation attorney who sues you till your ears bleed?"

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

'The proliferation of bird watchers make me more and more self-conscious...'

"His first out-of-body experience."

Unable to raise enough money for a trip to Paris, the Bartlesville High French Club had to settle for three days in Tulsa.

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

"Why do they do that?"

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

"Let's just say I have a pre-existing condition."

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

CSI: Mother Goose Unit...'Hmmm...I'm beginning to suspect that perhaps mister Dumpty's demise wasn't simply a tragic accident.'

"I've done this procedure so often I could do it in my sleep. But that's only happened twice – that I'll admit to."

Dog Walking Services

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

Squirrel Chasing a Dog

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

Skiing.

"When is my next parole hearing?"

"The fish sticks here are very good."

'Now I kinda wish we had planned a bigger wedding.'

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

'Fine stencilling. But have you never thought - Tit Willow, Tit Willow, Tit Willow?'

'Why don't you just pull over and let them pass already?!?'

'Hi, Doc! I don't think I'm going to need you after all....'

Man is stopped from entering doctor's surgery by a receptionist dressed as a bouncer.

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

Intelligent people laugh too!

Help! I'm ROFL and ICGU!

Giraffe Umbrella

Bad fake tan day.

"I told you playing Pin the Tail on the Donkey was a dumb idea."