Die-hard Comedy Follower Pillows

Prisoner stuck behind zebra stripes.

The Department of Really Stupid Ideas: 'Most people think they just appear out of thin air! But the truth is, there's a great deal of very hard work involved!'

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

'The proliferation of bird watchers make me more and more self-conscious...'

"His first out-of-body experience."

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

"Why do they do that?"

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

"Let's just say I have a pre-existing condition."

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

CSI: Mother Goose Unit...'Hmmm...I'm beginning to suspect that perhaps mister Dumpty's demise wasn't simply a tragic accident.'

"I've done this procedure so often I could do it in my sleep. But that's only happened twice – that I'll admit to."

"When is my next parole hearing?"

"The fish sticks here are very good."

Squirrel Chasing a Dog

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

Dog Walking Services

'Now I kinda wish we had planned a bigger wedding.'

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

'Fine stencilling. But have you never thought - Tit Willow, Tit Willow, Tit Willow?'

Skiing.

'Why don't you just pull over and let them pass already?!?'

Man is stopped from entering doctor's surgery by a receptionist dressed as a bouncer.

'Hi, Doc! I don't think I'm going to need you after all....'

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

Giraffe Umbrella

Bad fake tan day.

Intelligent people laugh too!

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

"Okay, you both know the rules: no trash talk, no batting the other guy all over the house if he’s unconscious, watch the claws and nails..."