Dictator Antics Pillows

"I want a large pepperoni, pronto! And don't be stingy with the cheese. No anchovies! If I find one anchovy, I'll have your head on a pole. . ."

"Are there treats? Just grab the treats and get outta there!"

Bar snacks served in bird-feeders.

"Sorry, bud. You know the rules... Dibs is dibs."

"So, Mr Canary, I see you have experience as a mine safety specialist..."

The Goalkeeper

Dog Training Academy and the Cat Anarchy Club.

'Follow that cab!'

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The David Letterman Show Goes to the Dogs, Cats, Birds, Guinea Pigs...

Jungle Games

'Captain, we're going to have to ask you to stop spiking the ball.'

Dog Training.

'No, Rusty, this one! You're barking up the wrong tree.'

Dog playing snooker/pool.

"If anyone should ask, I was in my doggy bed from 7 p.m. to midnight. Understand?"

"Come on... you love knocking things off the counter!"

"Here's your water, locally sourced from the restroom."

"Sure, you're a dictator, son, but Muriel's boy is an absolute dictator."

'Get Doc Weston and Tell him I have a fever and to come over quick. We have a show to do tonight.' The talking dog goes over to the doctor's house and simply says 'woof'.

"Have you ever considered getting braces?"

"I told you not to let him out of your sight."

'Okay...now watch what happens when I extend my claws.'

Dog stuck in cat flap.

cat singing into microphone

Cat taunts dog at intersection.

'I did give your brother a job - he's keeping an eye out for forest fires.'

"Just remember, you could end up just like me. . . dead and hanging upside down at a gas station. . ."

"Serves you right for licking it!"

Oliverachy - Short-lived political system where leaders were chosen by how many olives they could fit in their mouths.

Goosestepping Nazi Geese

"Not exactly - He believes that the ends justify BEING mean."

Lemming meringue pie.

'Hey, Pops...the peasants are out of food again and I wrecked my Mercedes... What do we do about it?'

"You threw the wrench again, didn't you?"

"Yeah, he's been doing this ever since we started feeding him human food."