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'I wish somebody would say something.'

Meet the Enemy

"This school has too many immigrants."

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

"Would you relax? All you guys are so tense. I just wanted to tell you to your face how enigmatic I find you."

I heard you've to an awful, mysterious pain in the side of your face. Yeah. You can try the modern approach, drug yourself silly so you don't feel the pain. You know a better way, Sadie? Well, in your case, I'd suggest going with the tried and true cure-all: Drill a hole in your head to let out the demons. No need. You're already out. That's ... Well-played, nemesis. Well-played.

Today on the Ask Sadie Show, we'll be addressing one single topic: Sandwiches. Specifically, we'll talk about how single-payer health care would put tons of spending money into the hands of the "sandwich generations." They'd pay a little more in taxes, but they wouldn't have to go deep into debt to be able to put their elderly parents in nursing homes. They could buy products and take vacations and put their sniveling brats through college, and still put the old folks in a nice, safe facility. W

Can you mumble, mumble mumble? You're mumbling. What are you saying? I'm asking for your mumble, mumble. You're asking for my help? I can't get the word out. Can I get a little mumble? Mumble.

Would you like to go for a walk, Lars? Something about this conversation seems very, very wrong.

"I don’t know if this is just the cashews talking, but I find you absolutely delightful."

'I like a woman who knows her own mind and isn't afraid to...'

'Oh, that is so simplistic. Why must you always see the world in black and white?'

'you should know my wife thinks I'm stupid.'

'We may be old but the supermarket's automatic doors still acknowledge our existence, so we still matter.'

"Why do you think cool cars are lame?"

"Where else in the world would you get such wonderful sunsets?"

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."

"So, you say I'll be doubling the numbers of animals I kill?"

"I can't decide if we're good people who are bad at communicating, or monsters who communicate perfectly."

"She's in a conversationally induced coma."

"They've remained remarkably faithful to the text."

"Let's talk film or let's not talk film - I'm easy."

What nationality were your parents? North or south Poles?

"They haven't said two words to each other—it's sad... I hope we don't end up like that." "They keep talking to each other—it's exhausting... So glad we don't have to do that."

"Let's say you've always wanted to make someone a mixtape to show them how much you care about them. What's the best order? Do you start with songs about how rich you are before moving on to the songs about love? Or vice versa?. . .What order would best simulate sincerity?"

Dialogue

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

So you're a mocking bird...

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

Grizzly bears are gregarious animals.

"Death Star? Is that in the Valley?"

"I used to drink to forget. Now, age-related, short-term memory loss takes care of that for me."

"I disagree — I think humans are funny."

"Gals, you know I hate being the center of attention, so for the next 45 minutes I am going to monologue about all the minute details of my wedding planning."