Dialogue Dancer T-Shirts

'Be patient. In 15 seconds you can skip his political opinioning and move right into sports.'

"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."

"Would you relax? All you guys are so tense. I just wanted to tell you to your face how enigmatic I find you."

"What do you want to talk about first...the kleptomania or the hoarding?"

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

Meet the Enemy

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

"Don't make me warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

"I disagree — I think humans are funny."

"...I don't believe in the past or the future. I don't even believe in right now. Everyone remembers the past differently. Everyone imagines the future differently. Everyone even disagrees about what's happening right now. So who's to say tomorrow what you and I did tonight?"

Exciting potato bugs.

Battle of the sexes in a relationship

Dialogue

'May I suggest a pleasant viognier to put the subtext into gear?'

LATE NIGHT WITH DAVID MAMET

"I'd appreciate a little more reacting to my ranting."

"How do I know God is not real? For the same reason I know people on TV can't see me."

Can you mumble, mumble mumble? You're mumbling. What are you saying? I'm asking for your mumble, mumble. You're asking for my help? I can't get the word out. Can I get a little mumble? Mumble.

"I've learned to give up when I hear Brooklyn in your voice."

"He's Right Behind Me, Isn't He?"

News and Magazines. Record Debt. Dollar Down. How can the dollar be weak when we've been giving it such a good workout?

Atheist Convention: 'I don't believe it!'

"I assumed it was writer's block but as I've never written anything I could be wrong."

'I wish somebody would say something.'

'But the only way I can explain our derivatives and stock swaps is through interpretive dance!'

'Oh, that is so simplistic. Why must you always see the world in black and white?'

"You don't need to be anti-white to be pro-black."

"Mother, take your time, I know this isn’t easy for you. But this is an important moment in our lives, so I will ask you one more time, what on earth did you do with my old comic books?!"

'you should know my wife thinks I'm stupid.'

"The nomenclature of 'political correctness' is devisive and opens the profession to ridicule!"

"Well, I'm an expert on communication!"

The unfortunate night there were two talking sticks at the conflict resolution meeting.

"It's time for an adult conversation, dear. Let's give your father a minute to leave the room."

I heard you've to an awful, mysterious pain in the side of your face. Yeah. You can try the modern approach, drug yourself silly so you don't feel the pain. You know a better way, Sadie? Well, in your case, I'd suggest going with the tried and true cure-all: Drill a hole in your head to let out the demons. No need. You're already out. That's ... Well-played, nemesis. Well-played.

'We may be old but the supermarket's automatic doors still acknowledge our existence, so we still matter.'