Dialogue Aficionado Pillows

"I'm not really into organized religion, though I am very spiritual."

Mamet Bedtime Stories

"Oh, he's a great conversationalist. Don't you know that money talks?"

'To be honest with you, I talk to myself as the only way to guarantee a quality discussion in this house!'

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

"Would you relax? All you guys are so tense. I just wanted to tell you to your face how enigmatic I find you."

"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."

"Where would you see yourself in five years' time?"

"Could I ask just one question?"

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

"Don't make me warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

Iran bars two UN nuclear inspectors for 'untruthful reporting'

"I disagree — I think humans are funny."

PERSONNEL, 'Why did you leave your previous employment?', 'They asked too many questions!'

'Thank goodness you were wrong mom, dad says a period is what comes at the end of a sentence.'

Wordplay: In The Bag.

'Your resume is impressive, but next time try to shorten it from 100 pages to one.'

"It lost a little something in translation."

"Who knew we had so many dislikes in common?"

Battle of the sexes in a relationship

'I think I'll become a lawyer.'

"...I don't believe in the past or the future. I don't even believe in right now. Everyone remembers the past differently. Everyone imagines the future differently. Everyone even disagrees about what's happening right now. So who's to say tomorrow what you and I did tonight?"

'Son, voting isn't a rational procedure by which one strategically selects an electable candidate who will best serve your interests. Voting is an emotional response to your gut level fears!'

We Will Beat Any Genuine Quote...

Staff Yearbook

"Oui, c'est bon. It is, how you Americans say, 'Magically Delicious'."

"Allow me to respond to your question with a question of my own that I can answer."

'Do it write the first time.'

" I'm sorry. I was so busy listening to myself talk that I forgot what I was saying."

'I was just beginning to think about my portfolio. Now you're telling me to rethink it.'

"Isn't us talking about how I would never take a ballroom dancing class an activity we're doing together?"

Dyslexia is no longer a disorder...

"They're home...the party's over!"

"I should warn you that many of John's thoughts are subliminal."

LATE NIGHT WITH DAVID MAMET