Debate Aficionado Pillows

'If there's one thing I can't stand it's nit-picking pedantry.' 'That's two things.'

'Yes, I am a Doctor. Here's my card if you ever fancy dying.'

"A word of advice...a simple yes or no answer must be avoided at all times."

'Son, voting isn't a rational procedure by which one strategically selects an electable candidate who will best serve your interests. Voting is an emotional response to your gut level fears!'

"Higher deficits? Fair enough. Out of control spending? Maybe. But who gets invited to George Clooney's house for dinner? This guy!"

'We've proven without a doubt, that this particle has a negative charge. Unfortunately, an accelerator in Switzerland has proven, without a doubt, that it has a positive charge.'

"Of course she can."

"You can't legislate morality."

'30% liked you, 34% liked your opponent, and 36% were sick of politics.'

Always the smartest guy in the room.

Gym Jordan: Word Clod

Poetry debate

Closing Remarks: 'And let me say in conclu...conclu...clu...'

POLLS, 'Who do you think is the greatest person who ever lived -- Barack or Michelle?'

Political Symbols: Republican elephant, Democratic donkey and uninformed voter.

Be objective - never take your own side in an argument.

'Mr. Martin, you said 'on the other hand' three times. How many hands do you have?'

"I think Republicans and Democrats alike can agree that Frank Shustermann is dead."

Dialogue!

We must get back to fundamentals, taught by fundamentalists!

"I say let's introduce the burqa...for men!!"

"My weasel of an opponent is running a negative campaign, but unlike that dirtbag, I'm taking the high road."

"Don't mention Pat Buchanan, pro or con."

"Two 'Charlie roses' doesn't make you a Middle East scholar!"

"It tickles me that my vote will cancel Paul Krugman's."

I'm sorry Bob, but I disagree with your assessment of the trade deficit. You know I hate it when you beg to differ.

The Republican Point of View: Not a Smoking Gun

"I'm telling you, Hutchins. It's 'Feed a fever. Starve a cold.'"

The Magical MAGA Inverting Mirror

" ... and I'm happy to report I've formed an exploratory committee to help me determine whatever the hell it is you people want to hear."

"When we're independent, we can vote for independence as often as we like."

Open Carry

OppressorSplaining

Democrats Said Brett Kavanaugh Would Bring the End Times. Why Are They So Polite To Him at His Confirmation Hearing?

The Difficult Decision Facing Voters in the 2020 Election