Devil's Advocates Gifts

"But I thought once the I.R.S. applied a penalty, that was the end of it."

"It's amazing how some people manage to make all of eternity seem even longer."

Some make better deals than others.

'Gloria, tell my nine-o'clock to go to hell.'

'It's been a long time since we've had anyone in for sloth.'

"I gave him a public education Artie ol' boy. . . you should know by now that government schools are one of my best minion corporations!"

Nobody suspects it but the entrance to hell is in the building at 122c, Willow Street.

"The 'Ex' huh?"

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

"When faced with a tricky ethical issue, I always ask the question, 'What's in it for me?'"

Snow Devil

"Hey, I'm just playing devil's avocado!"

Protect Victims of Domestic and Sexual Violence

'So, gentlemen, how's the dollar trading against the immortal soul, today?'

'I knew if we waited long enough, heaven would downsize.'

'It's another corporate lawyer...do we want to buy a soul?'

Route 666

"Dave, quick word about religious symbols in the workplace..."

"Nixon was the same way when he first got here."

Justice 4 Ron

"Behold! I am God! I know all. Yet I'm constantly testing you even though I already know what you'll do. But I'll still punish you for the sins I planned for you to do. And you'll suffer in a fiery pit, tormented beyond imagining forever and ever and ever

"I told you to pack a damned sweater."

'I know you don't belong here, but if we let you go to Heaven, we couldn't not guarantee your safety.'

Religious texts from heaven and hell find common ground...they are made in China.

'I chose here since heaven won't allow you to take your bonus and golden parachute with you.'

"Where do you see yourself in five years? Haha, just kidding!"

"If you want my opinion you're damned if you do and damned if you don't."

'I'm putting you in charge of past due accounts.'

'Let me guess - a toastmaster?'

"Can I see that 'National Law Journal' when you're through with it?"

'Just be patient. Greed always makes a come back.'

"What about you, Bob – do you think you're being a little possessive?"

"The presenting sponsor of The Dr. Faust Podcast is, as always, Mephistopheles."

"I can't believe I sold my soul for platforms, they're so last season"

"Say what you will about Donald Trump, he's one helluva negotiator."