Detox Diva T-Shirts

"Nice try, Jim, but there's no such thing as a 'Beer cleanse'."

'I'm detoxing - do you have any mineral water?'

Let's get organized

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

"Where do we put Desserts?"

Be Healthy

"Can you come back? We're still counting carbs."

"The most I'll splurge on my diet is on a boneless, skinless carrot."

"Are these prices?" "No, that's our Calorie-fixe menu."

The candy house, if the tale of Hansel and Gretel would happen today.

'For heaven's sake, Lois, when are you going to give up this mad dieting of yours?' (woman falls through drain).

'I realize it's not on the menu but I'm on a diet and I'd like an air fern salad.'

"I lost 20lbs on my diet. I guess it's time for a relapse."

"Lately, I've been trying to spend less time staring at the glowing orb."

"I'm very health conscious. I only eat animals that are vegetarians"

Out of patience

Valleyview diet clinic

'Diet considerations.'

"Don't bother gathering carbs for me, I'm on the Paleo diet."

'Looks like Shelia has overdone it with the cream scones this week!'

"Would you buy the apple pie for me? I'm on the 'No You Don't!' Diet."

"...there, I found it. Stellar! I love this nutrition app!"

"Here's your dessert. A guilt counselor iss standing by to help you once you calculate how many calories you've consumed."

''Exercise'? -- But I hate to eat and run!'

'Your Majesty, the peasants are out of bread!', 'Then let them eat low-carb stuff.'

Woman in a bathtub.

"I can't have anything that's a food."

'...your teeth are putting on weight.'

"One slice—hold the bread."

'I don't want you to give up eating entirely -- just the food part.'

'I've decided to get serious about losing weight. I moved the refrigerator out of my bedroom.'

Woman stands on scales, holds bunch of balloons.

"Happy Birthday, dear! It's gluten-free, lactose-free and sugar-free."

'It counts as one of your five portions a day.'