Desperation Navigators T-Shirts

"We're both unemployed and we're broke...we have to go to that next level of American desperation."

Emergency Phone.

'All those in doubt, raise your eyebrows.'

'I've made a radio using coconuts, salt water, and a trout.'

Scarecrow Directions

"How long have you had this nightmare of being shot down by a beagle on a flying doghouse, Herr Von Richthofen?"

"It's perfectly all right. I used to do the same sort of thing when I was a little boy."

Support Group for the Directionally Challenged.

'But Mom, can't I just skip puberty and go straight to mid-life crisis?'

"Mother believed in tough love. She was always there for me when I needed a cold shoulder to cry on."

'Call yourself a mountain guide?'

"Burroughs? Yeah, I know him. He'll stoop to anything and has absolutely no sense of shame... Lucky stiff!"

"Your blind dates is at the bar - I'll upgrade you to a table by the getaway door."

"Boxing day is so boring."

"Come and get me, coppers!"

'Was it the non-flying dream again?'

'Maybe it was a left turn at the last set of traffic lights...?'

'We don't have a GPS or any maps, so this is the best I could do.'

The Choice of Fame and Fortune.

Recalculating!

Excess Baggage: Most taxi drivers have GPS in their cars, but will still get completely lost when you are the passage.

"You're holding the map upside-down."

Worry about everything that might happen/Me/Be ready for nothing that does happen.

'That last hill was a bit steep!'

Messing about in Boats.

"Bittersweet dreams, small side of regrets, and a nice slice of moving on."

Dangerous dinghy...

"My last interview seemed to take on some negative energy after I handcuffed myself to a chair and refused to leave without a job offer."

'I know she hasn't turned out well but there's no sense in us BOTH feeling guilty about it.'

"I'm new to the area, they help me find my way home."

'I had a nightmare last night. And when I woke up this morning, it was lying next to me.'

After getting a GPS, Harold constantly felt outnumbered in family arguments.

'You are hopelessly lost.'

You Are Nowhere.