Desk Ornament Appreciator T-Shirts

"Yes, we've not told you before about bringing your cat to work... we thought it was just a plush toy!"

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

'AT&T? I'm letting you go. I'm down-sizing too!'

"It's made entirely out of rejected resumes."

"Sorry sir - the self-propelling pencils have all just walked out..."

'Miss Pym, we've made a smaller loss than last year, order me a much larger desk.'

"It's too late for Jim. The tchotchkes have him now."

Executive golf with Newton's cradle

"Looks like our days at the think tank are numbered."

'Miss Finch, find out what she does over there and offer her twice as much to do it over here.'

"Well, let's quickly put Ken's incredibly incendiary remarks behind us and hopefully continue the discussion in a simmering rage."

Research and Development: Now, Never.

The Pencil and Sharpener

'Hey! I sad, 'You've got mail!''

'Boss, it seems like a friendly text, but you've got to learn to read between the emoticons.'

"I think I see a miscreant in the carpark. There's no time to call the police I must deal with it myself."

"To be clear you are willing to labor under misconceptions?"

"While you were out, the staff whittled away your desk into a totem pole."

Dog to hirer: 'I'm a mongrel, and I'll work like one.'

'In,' 'Out' and 'Organize.'

'Now you see, that's EXACTLY what we should try to avoid here.'

'Being taller than me will get you nowhere.'

Lad to man behind desk: 'I notice your fish is 10 times larger than your picture of me!!'

'I've had that sign on the desk for 30 years, waiting for the bucks to roll in, but I'm as broke as ever.'

"I have to be honest: the job you're applying for is a real no-brainer. Are you sure you're OK with that?"

Big desks take time.

'No hostile takeover bids beyond this point.'

We only have two things to fear - fear itself and someone getting a look at our books.

New Age Office Supplies Catalog.

'This better be important.'

Businessman with novelty in and out baskets.

"Good: I see you're fluent in nonsense."