Desk Diplomat T-Shirts

The free and sovereign republic of the ninth floor.

"I can't hold it together much longer. . . If Bradley doesn't wipe that smug, self-satisfied smirk off his face soon, I swear I'll kill him."

'We consult those with whom we agree, which is why I rarely consult my conscience.'

'This is not a good perspective to argue from.'

'They aren't shy about cutting you out of the decision making process.'

Everyone likes to feel appreciated.

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

Schengen

"Nation-building never works."

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

"Tariffs love me...tariffs love me not..."

Trump Administration Raising White Flag in Ukraine

Albania and North Macedonia: entrance denied

Who will determine Venezuela's future?

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

Flags

"'I don't want war'. . . well, wither our translation program is broke or this president has a strange kind of humor!"

UK/US Free Trade Deal

Pretty Flowers

"They decided giving out pink slips was too impersonal. So now they're blue."

"Be patient. He'll have to visit the water cooler sooner or later."

"Well, it looks like the merger is off."

Neo-International Law

"I need to see your budget proposal."

Growl - Hiss Conflict Resolution Meeting

Inclusive speech

"Away with the warmonger!"

ZOOM 'n' GLOOM.

"We can waste time and look for a solution or...just find a scapegoat?"

"You and your, 'why bother to learn another language. Everyone in the known universe speaks, Zarconian'!"

"National security adviser"

You Are Here - Uncle Sam's Exit Strategy

"I can't decide what I fear the most, Putin's Russia or Putin's America."

"A student skipped a model U.N. meeting – now he's claiming diplomatic immunity."

'We're making progress. I just got a firm 'maybe'.'