Dental Therapist Gifts

The bad news is that your teeth are shot. The good news is that you have the uvula of a man half your age.'

Dentist Training School.

'Maybe you should stay away from dental humour.'

"Whales eat billions of tiny shrimp-like creatures called krill. The krill are free but whales spend a fortune on dental floss."

"Oh, I like coming to the dentists. It's the only place where people actually ask me to spit!"

The tooth fairy.

"Four years of dental school only to tell all my patients 'Don't worry about any tooth issues - they'll just fall out and be replaced, anyway'."

A tube of toothpaste doesn't reach its full potential until in the hands of a baby.

Don't swallow. I've lost a contact.

"I did the best dental health poster in the class. I just hope Mr. Tooth Decay doesn't hold a grudge."

'I'm not happy with his latest school photo.'

'The doctor's gonna have to wire your mouth shut for a month... but guess what! If you're brave, I'll give you this lollipop when he's done!'

"Open wide please! So I can get my hand out!"

Dr, Wagner's dental floss spider web made going to the dentist much more appealing to kids,

"Dear? The toothpaste is on the top shelf. Don't touch the tube on the bottom shelf, that's Grandma's triple strength epoxy denture adhesive."

"Pollyanna, your teeth are shot. Stop sugar coating everything!"

"You can't possibly know how I feel. Everybody likes you."

'It's the same everywhere: body over brains.'

'When you said you had an investment in gold, you didn't mention it was in your teeth!'

'Frankly, our dental plan bites.'

"Each order comes with 10 minutes of free guilt counseling."

"Freud doesn't work for you, so I', going to try some Dr. Anthony Fauci..."

'Nigel, what have I told you about bringing your work home with you?'

Oct. 1982: Researchers attempt an ill-fated procedure in great white shark oral hygiene.

"You're completely screwed up."

"Since you're going to the dentist, I bought you a giant lollipop to go out in style."

Day for day i feel more and more empty.

"Really? You can make me look younger!"

Toothbrush Romance

No Cavity Club/No New Gum Receding Club

"I'd like to change my major from dental to mental."

"Why can't you just learn to floss like other men?"

"My brother thinks he's a chicken... He's crazy."

"Well, the alternative would be to use your social media accounts to promote toothlessness."

"The first step is admitting you're a dog."