Dental Therapist Pillows

The bad news is that your teeth are shot. The good news is that you have the uvula of a man half your age.'

Dentist Training School.

'Maybe you should stay away from dental humour.'

"Whales eat billions of tiny shrimp-like creatures called krill. The krill are free but whales spend a fortune on dental floss."

"Oh, I like coming to the dentists. It's the only place where people actually ask me to spit!"

The tooth fairy.

"Four years of dental school only to tell all my patients 'Don't worry about any tooth issues - they'll just fall out and be replaced, anyway'."

A tube of toothpaste doesn't reach its full potential until in the hands of a baby.

Don't swallow. I've lost a contact.

"I did the best dental health poster in the class. I just hope Mr. Tooth Decay doesn't hold a grudge."

'I'm not happy with his latest school photo.'

'The doctor's gonna have to wire your mouth shut for a month... but guess what! If you're brave, I'll give you this lollipop when he's done!'

"Open wide please! So I can get my hand out!"

"Each order comes with 10 minutes of free guilt counseling."

'When you said you had an investment in gold, you didn't mention it was in your teeth!'

"You can't possibly know how I feel. Everybody likes you."

"Pollyanna, your teeth are shot. Stop sugar coating everything!"

'Frankly, our dental plan bites.'

'It's the same everywhere: body over brains.'

"Dear? The toothpaste is on the top shelf. Don't touch the tube on the bottom shelf, that's Grandma's triple strength epoxy denture adhesive."

Oct. 1982: Researchers attempt an ill-fated procedure in great white shark oral hygiene.

"Freud doesn't work for you, so I', going to try some Dr. Anthony Fauci..."

"Since you're going to the dentist, I bought you a giant lollipop to go out in style."

"I'd like to change my major from dental to mental."

Day for day i feel more and more empty.

Toothbrush Romance

"Why can't you just learn to floss like other men?"

"Really? You can make me look younger!"

"Well, the alternative would be to use your social media accounts to promote toothlessness."

"You're completely screwed up."

"The first step is admitting you're a dog."

No Cavity Club/No New Gum Receding Club

'What kind of filling would you like?'