Dental Hygiene Geek Pillows

Costco Floss

"Really? You can make me look younger!"

No Cavity Club/No New Gum Receding Club

"2 for 1 special: Clean, polish, buff, seal"

'Did you use mouthwash this morning?'

Dentist's Office: 'I know that $3,280 hurt you more than it did me, Dad.'

"My husband Frank still has all his own teeth...he keeps them in that jar over the fireplace!"

Floss Street Vendor

Things you forgot to tell me about getting older: "You're going to need bigger tooth floss."

'...your teeth are putting on weight.'

The inscription says: 'Whiter teeth; fresher breath.'

'I don't like the mediciney taste of this mouthwash either. I hate that taste of eyes of newt and turtle brains first thing in the morning.'

'You're not supposed to use 'dental floss' on dentures!'

'I still have all my own teeth.'

'Please become a NHS dentist!'

"Please point out the problem tooth."

'Most of the dental floss gets thrown out on used. No wonder I'm always broke.'

Grassy breath?

They all have one thing in common...they all have bad breath.

'What are you doing? We only take the teeth they leave under the pillow.'

"I'll take your word for it. You don't have to show me your used floss."

Three little pig's wolf has bad breath

'Does your company have a dental plan?'

'Let's see... how many squeezes did that commercial say to put on the brush?'

"Thanks, Doc- you've put me back in business."

"So, you see, what you were really looking for was a deeper connection with your father, and not the dentist's office down the hall."

"Don't get too excited. Getting a filling does not make you a cyborg."

'I know! He has the worst breath!'

' ... plus you need to floss better.'

(Cursing symbols)! Did I have a piece of spinach stuck to my tusk the whole date?

'I used some of that stripy toothpaste. Now I have striped teeth!'

'You need to chuck more wood.'

"If you won't brush or floss could you at least run your tongue over your teeth once in a while?"

Toothbrush Superhero.

The Tooth Fairy on Vacation. Museum of Natural History.