Defense Strategy Fan Pillows

"Nice moat."

'Why can't we just kick Caesar upstairs?'

"But I won't bore you with the all too familiar story of a dictator's rise to absolute power,"

"You dropped yer wallet."

A military officer sits at his desk with desk trays marked 'Search' and 'Destroy.'

"My God—I've forgotten the number of my Swiss bank account!"

"What do you suppose Ken Burns will have to say about all this in 30 years?"

'The attack will have to wait until tomorrow Congressman. Today is furlough day. . .'

They had no idea what they were doing, but it didn't matter...

"Business has been steady."

'I envisioned something more robust'

For the War Inventions Board: The Shell-diverter for returning the enemy's fire.

The Trench-Sealer

'Where was I on the night of the 7th of August? I was home washing my hair.'

'Look, thanks for your concern, but I think a flood is something we can cope with!'

"Why don't we settle this with rock, paper, scissors."

'The Humpty-Dumpty project is way over budget.'

Eustarch the Younger - the kid who brought the Trojan Horse in through the gates of Troy 'just to play with for a while'.

Repurposed Porpise: US Navy

Trump stirred up world opinion over Jerusalem decision

One More River to Cross. How the Last German got back across the Yser.

Naval Battle off Memphis, Leading to Capture of City

"I can't help you if you don't let your guard down."

'Wow, I'll earn my black belt in no time.'

The final secret-santa gift exchange between the Greeks and the Trojans.

Soldiers attempt to break into a castle with a credit card.

'These military teams really take their defence seriously...!'

"You have roots and I have troops."

"Any more martial arts tricks you want to show me?"

"I don't get it. Every time we send an agent into Ukraine, this how they come back."

Anglo-French Naval Rivalry,1861

"I had a brainstorm at the Existential Marketing Seminar. What if we did nothing?"