Decoration Designer T-Shirts

"Rough week, Gourdie?"

Santa with a mobile made from presents.

"For some reason they put mannequins of us up every year."

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

'Fine stencilling. But have you never thought - Tit Willow, Tit Willow, Tit Willow?'

'Make sure you pretend to water it.'

'You say 'dead.' I say 'low maintenance.''

Painting by the numbers for adults

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

"All in favor of destroying the throw pillow, raise your paw."

Painting the Ceiling

Use your imagination.

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

'Frankly, I think watching paint dry has been given a bad press.'

'And just what makes you think I don't know what I'm doing?!!'

"Careful with that - the wife made it at pottery class."

'Can I invite my friends round to watch, Mom?'

"You're welcome."

"We went for Scandinavian interiors."

"Ikea for hippies" 1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood

"We're looking for something for our panic room."

'Come on, you can help me to choose some lovely wallpaper.'

"Well, yes, it's not what you would call a practical nest, but my wife insisted on using an architect..."

"Too bright."

"I hear you've been doing exciting things with eggs and dye."

'I had no idea Ikea had been around so long.'

'This plant which you brought to me from your office snubs all my other plants.'

'We want it painted the colour of money!'

School Career Choices: Celebrity chef, celebrity gardener,celebrity plumber, celebrity vet, celebrity painter & decorator. . .

Framed Lady

"Could we be getting a little too museum-quality?"

"I don't think our smart home likes the color we painted it. It keeps spitting it out."

Christmas Presents.