Decking Devotee Gifts

'How's my driving?'

Dun Decking

'I wonder why scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats.'

'I'm having trouble with my drinking. Arthritis in my elbow.'

"I told you not to polish the car too much."

"An object of love that you can get inside, totally inside."

'They learn fast, don't they?'

"God, I love this show!"

"Man does not live by chips alone. There's also guacamole."

"Alarmingly, after five minutes the pool had come no closer."

"Just for once, why don't we forget the poor and blow the lot down the local tavern?"

"It's only insomnia if there's nothing good on."

A dead business executive is lowered into the grave with his desk

In an alternate universe, characters from the rough draft and finished manuscript of the same novel meet themselves at a cocktail party.

"The latest news on the gardening fashion front is 'Ditch the decking'!"

"My one regret is that I didn't spend more quality time with my office."

Desk sale

'...and the Brewery are considering giving you a loyaly card!'

"I was deadwood but I'm out of a job. I guess I'm driftwood."

'Don't drink on an empty head.'

'I'm having what he's having.'

"You were doing 10 knots over the limit."

"Haven't you heard! There's going to be a bit of a reshuffle!"

Bob worked hard to avoid the spotlight.

Beach Day

"Never, NEVER sit on top of the truck."

Dive in...

'There it goes, there it goes, there it goes...'

'Italian, Russian or Ranch?'

'Uh-oh.'

Swan Diving

'I knew it!'

I love swimming.

Yeah, Bob, aces are low again.

"The top two drawers are for insurance purposes, the next two are accounts payable, and we let a homeless man named Lenny sleep in the bottom drawer at night.'"