Debut Novel Release T-Shirts

'Is this your first book launch?'

"Just be yourself."

Producer, Director and Novelizer.

"This is my new country song I wrote about my self-driving truck leaving me..."

"Meet the author"

First Novels.

"Welcome to Off-Off-Off Broadway."

"Toi Toi Toi!"

Silly wig.

Madame Rejane- Famous French Actress in the Part of Madame Sans Gene

"Maybe I don't like stunning debuts."

BOOKSHOP, 'We're pushing our do-it-yourself kit today, sir -- a ream of paper and a dozen pencils.'

Meet the author - celebrity autobiographies,

"Eventually the instrument becomes an extension of your body."

"That was too many fresh original voices for one night."

Trilby - Finis

'He speaks for our entire generation. Pity he's such a bore...'

Snail Man

"I've read all your books and seen all your plays, and I wear your 'Gimme' cap."

"Sorry, I meant to say "good luck", not "break a leg"..."

Sumo Love.

"Tom's writing has been going really well! He's written over 200,000 words. Now he just needs to work out what order to put them in!"

Meet the author Billy Bovine.

'Be gentle with me, it's my first novel.'

"This is my first book, but if I like it I may buy another in the near future."

"I wrote, self-published and remaindered it myself."

"I just got a huge advance for my first novel. It's about a writer who gets a huge advance for his first novel."

"January 11. Still struggling with the novel. Chopped more firewood."

'As is the fashion these days, it's about nothing.'

Meet the Authors

"As your first novel, it starts out badly and just falls away!"

Meet the Oar-thor.

Getting Published

'Your book has a wonderful, timely quality. We're putting it on our list for a 2009 release.'