Debt Optimist Pillows

"Well, your computer here may say I'm overdrawn, but my computer at home says I have oodles of money, so what do you say we split the difference?"

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

'Call the boss! We're in trouble!'

"We're always excited to hear from analysts who are bullish on the market."

'Can you loan me *** till pay day?'

'It's a type of credit card that self destructs when it reaches the limit I've set for you.'

'We're quite confident this lull won't last long.'

Student Debt

'We can mortgage your future for a very attractive low interest rate.'

To Stock Exchange

Core Business.

"All of the economic indicators I've seen are pointing up."

"Don't worry, all the politicians are promising that we have a bright future ahead of us..."

"On our budget, I'm glad the Keebler Elves were available."

'There's no interest on your purchase for a year. Then we become VERY interested in your balance after that.'

Learning from economics

'You need to alter your portfolio allocation. Right now it's 25% stocks, 15% bonds and 60% margin loans.'

"Oh I don't think it's as bad as all that. In fact, I think we're in the golden age of something which we won't even realize it's the golden age of until many years from now."

The sixth college sense. 'I see debt people.'

business illustration

'I may be 40 years old, but I have the student debt of a 20 year old.'

The End is Near/Just the Beginning

"Some say we can't go on making millions forever, but I think they're wrong!"

"The side effects of this experimental medication are; happiness, improved eye sight and increased strength. . . Oh well, back to the drawing board."

Bank of Mum and Dad.

'50 of the population spends more than they earn. That's where we come in.'

'Do you have poor credit? . . . Visit paydayloanshark.com for instant cash!'

"Norman thinks we should close our borders to climate change."

'You'll like him. He's very optimistic - he believes that money can make you happy.'

"Yes, we can assist with upside-down mortgages!"

'You have the most education of all the applicants, but your unpaid student loans hurt your credit score, so we can't hire you.'

"You're bankrupt... That'll be $45,000 please..."

I can't handle this mortgage.

'Attention!!! You wolves down there!!! Get away from my door!!! I'm doing the best that I can!!!'

'I prefer to look at the market as half bull.'