Deals And Offers Gifts

'Big Sale 2 for the Price of 1.'

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

'What do you do with the time you save?'

(Visual gag) Wellard's annual BIG HANDBAG SALE!! A woman is dragging a huge bag out from a bag shop

'Big sale at the Dog Store. Buy 1, get 2 free.'

"Wait a sec, I have a coupon around here somewhere."

When Tia Carmen says... "I got it for a very good price!" it means...she stopped at a garage sale on the way home.

"The pizza came late and it was cold!"

Unusual Offers

Holiday Sales: The Starting Line

'I'm afraid you'll have to buy a car, sir -- Braxton, here, accidentally sold your car to somebody else.'

"And when the extended warranty kicks in, we send you a big can of new car smell."

"We're having a special today on bright futures."

'Please, Dad? Can we? Can we? Pleeeease?'

Pizza Special: 5 Pizzas for $50 (Limit 4).

"At this rate I'll be delivering all gift certificates, gift cards and I.O.U.s!"

Dictionary Sale - Now in High Definition.

'I don't need to know what it is when it's on sale.'

"I'll split my candy with you if you take me Trick or Treating."

Everything for a buck.

Legal Firm, Suits, 30% Off.

"They weren't doing a two for one on moisturisers, low fat yogurt or muesli then!!"

Boomerang Sale! - No Returns

1/2 price on Day-Old Coffee.

'And this war game comes with an AK 47.'

"How much is the sign?"

'Special offer today -TWO for one, sir!'

Shopping Torture

'Shove' (at big sale).

Hole Sale

'They've got a great deal here. When you buy one meal, I get mine half price!'

'What split would you settle for, fifty fifty?' - 'As long as I get the hyphen as well.'

"So with 50% sale discount, plus the 30% early bird reduction, a 10% bonus for paying in full and a $100 cash back... we owe you $1.75"

'So do you want one with an accelerator, or one with brakes?'

"Even on the internet my Mom shops til she drops"