Dealing With Pet Loss Pillows

'They were so upset when the goldfish died, I had to get them another pet.'

"He was a very good boy."

"As a friend, I pray you rest in peace. As a dog, I really want to dig you up."

'What - NINE whole lives for only ONE eternity?'

Very Difficult Conversations

"The document states that you've been left your mother's jowls and upper arm flab."

"As the executor for your mother's estate, let me say that she loved each of you, but she also loved Las Vegas."

'He loved that dog.'

Remember my mum? I took that photo a week before she died. There's one of me...that was a good haircut.

'In memory of our beloved Skippy.'

"This is just SO like him. For years, I begged him to straighten up and fly right, and when he finally DID, it was right into a picture window!"

Halo Frisbee.

Blues artis's daily list

"Only one of my lives was a bowl of cherries."

"Behold the secret to happiness."

"I've already made arrangements to be flushed down the toilet."

'I wish these wings were for more than show.'

A Male Angel throwing his Halo as a Frisbee for his Dog to catch.

"I'm afraid Dad did not leave us anything of value in his will, but his last wish is for us to continue the feud with the neighbour's cat...

"I know, boy—I miss the smoked salmon at Zabar's, too."

'Se Non E Vero' Etc.

'Actually,I didn't start drinking until his dog died.'

"All dogs go to Heaven, because we're not the ones who screwed up."

"Although the estate will be distributed equally, your father wanted you all to know that Keith was his favorite, followed by..."

"In heaven you can pee on the carpet."

"This next one is for Lucy, my huge dead goldfish."

"Great pet, but we should have given him less energy."

'As you know, your father liked the sport of Boxing...'

"After Harry was gone I started decorating the house as a distraction. It was around the time I was wallpapering the driveway that I thought I should seek grief counseling."

"But you're paper trained and we don't have any newspapers or newspaper people."

"I know I agreed to hold a funeral for Wendy's goldfish...but did she have to ask Reverend Clark to officiate?"

"Sure, it's disrespectful, but knowing old scamp, he'd want us to dig up his bones."