Dealer Devotee Mugs

Hit me.

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

'I'm 60-40 in favor of the 60.'

Bubble Gum Dispenser

"My lessons on Enlightenment are a prerequisite to my graduate-level course on Investing in Derivatives."

"An object of love that you can get inside, totally inside."

"Okay, who's purring?"

"I told you not to polish the car too much."

"...And please let the merger do through!"

'Though we understand your feelings towards your automobile, we aren't able to approve your application to marry it.'

"He used to be a senior fact checker at Meta — now he's just a pedant."

'Hey, that's a bad roll. Let's try that again.'

A dead business executive is lowered into the grave with his desk

Hire a lawyer - get one free! Limited time only.

"I think you better let me drive, I haven't renewed your license yet."

'Why did he cut the chicane - the giant spider isn't on the track, he's on our screen.'

"My one regret is that I didn't spend more quality time with my office."

Give Thanks.

'It's not bad enough that he explains everything... He even explains his explanations.'

"I like your slavish attention to detail."

Dun Decking

Desk sale

Looking Daggers

A man working on a model airplane

'Now that's devotion. Two broken arms and still working.'

"Red 14...No, it's black 23, no, no..it's..."

"Murder, eh? They nabbed me for bargain-hunting without a license."

"A guard dog?! You think you're a guard dog!

Man's Best Friend - Man's Worst Friend - Man's Only Friend

'I'm sorry to say that one among you is not pulling his weight... I don't think it's necessary to name names.'

'Michael left me because of my extreme couponing...at least I think he left me.'

'By the time I finish explaining the rules, I've lost 'em.'

"I find it difficult to like him. He's too good at being humble."

Tortoise being tested for performance enhancing drugs.