Deal Decoder Pillows

Every Friday lunchtime procurement managers would gather to boast of the size of bid documents they had received that week.

"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

“It's $195 million. Now, I know what you're thinking: 'OK, what's the catch?'”

When Tia Carmen says... "I got it for a very good price!" it means...she stopped at a garage sale on the way home.

That's supposed to say garage sale!

"That's Hicks from the corporate office. He's adorable, but trust me—when it comes to acquisitions, he's an animal!"

Sale.

'And I want that end table for $40...' When bargain hunters crack.

'Very well, I'll introduce you. Ego, meet ID. Now get back to work.'

"The Box is bigger, the contents smaller, increased the price and called it improved."

Half-Price Haircut and Half-Cut Price Hair.

Screwdriver labelled 'Buyer' and screw labelled 'seller'.

Paw readings

DIY horror.

The miracle of 2-for-1 pizza.

'I don't need to know what it is when it's on sale.'

Pizza Special: 5 Pizzas for $50 (Limit 4).

'hold the blog - I got a bargain in the sales'

"I'm innocent. I've just never been able to pass up a good plea bargain."

Sales - We could try a 'free offer' but it would cost us.

'Sheisse ... What ein dream!' - Freud

Buy One Get One Free Sign Outside Shoe Shop

"I give you the seven-billion dollar pup, then you give me back the seven-billion-dollar pup."

"We can now shop for, purchase and crash our new car online."

The Bargain Brand

"I dreamed last night that I was furious at you for charging me for missing last week's session. What do you think it means?"

Black Friday

Boomerang Sale! - No Returns

"You get one every time you order something online."

"As you know we've made a lot of acquisitions lately, and the last one we made seems to have resulted in us buying ourselves."

'The gas bill is a lot bigger than usual.'

'Yes, it is a carrot. You haven't been getting enough fibre.'

'Our definition of a 'bargain' is right there in the small print.'

'Our survey shows there's more confidence in shopping coupons than in the dollar...'