Dating Tactician T-Shirts

'I've prepared this powerpoint presentation about myself which takes precisely the allotted five minutes.'

I've got to make an offering to the cheapskate muse. What's that got to do with me? You understand women. What could I do to bring back my goddess of inspiration? That's nice. What's nice? Goddess of inspiration. You mind if I use that line on this hottie I met when I was trolling for broads at the bus station? This is not helping! No, it is. Don't sell yourself short. HOJ.

I really think I can handle this date on my own. Lemme ask you something. Would you trust me alone with a ybot 340? An Xbox 360? They changed the name? Okay. But you cannot hit on my date. I'm only here to help.

Good luck with all the revision...

GPC needs to make its new formula foolproof.

Examinations.

'I don't like Gerald as a person, but I like him as a concept.'

"Listen to me, Nathan. Chicks love bad boys."

Yeah, you're right. She's playing hard-to-get.

"Well I didn't see the incident myself.."

'So far, sir, we've rejected plans A,B, C, D, E, F, and right now we're evaluating'G'.'

"Instead of making a long-term commitment to marriage, I've decided to lease a man."

A man reads a book called 'Opening Lines' while a woman reads a book called 'Brush Offs'.

'Columbus might not have sailed over the edge, but I did.'

War never felt the same after the Great Puppy Ambush.

Rugby - Interesting line-out tactics.

The Use of Cavalry

'Unlike Wall Street, with its strict rules regulating insider trading, 'Love Street' remains un-regulated, and I'm pleases to let you know now, before the official announcement, that the position of Rolf Fusco's girlfriend is open.'

'Don't forget the plan - When he gets weak from laughing - Hit him with your left!'

Kosovo.

'With your permission sir... checkmate.'

'What else do you have going for you besides being aggressive?'

'I've got the answers to the test written on my hands and arms. It's old school artificial intelligence.'

"Tell your date you're a vegetarian before he orders that expensive gourmet dinner."

Personnel. What do I call those gaps in my work history? Quality time.

Dating Rule #1. Repeat after me: I need some space. I need some space. Got it. Good. Make sure you tell that to Laurel all the time. But

"I know I told you to fool him into thinking you've got nothing left, but now you've got me convinced."

'Thank you colonel we'll keep your strategy in mind.'

"Why do I always choose 'The Bad Boy'?"

Manager. Managing a political campaign and a baseball team are alike in many ways. A campaign is launched with a "first pitch," when a candidate gives a speech selling himself or herself. I change pitchers based on the game situation. In politics and baseball, sometimes it's best to come from the right side and sometimes it's best to come from the left side. We study our competitors' weaknesses and exploit those. In politics we call that "opposition research." And I don't worry about the

"Now we have all your arrows!"

"Next!"

"Our marriage counselor would be so proud of us now."

"Your resume says you specialize in field work."

'Your resume is very creative. It's all a crock."