Dating Scene Critic Pillows

Sue meets another Winner

"She's just being Koi."

Updated fairy tales - "Cinderella." Dating Service. It's not often we get a client looking for a specific shoe size.

'He had bulging muscles and a wallet to match!'

Alligator Bars

'Complements of the big smelly gentleman.'

"So, tell me, how many guys have you slept with?"

He's Tasty!

'You were wrong, Bob, that wasn't her come-hither look!'

"Sorry I'm late... I was getting our date approved by my lawyer."

"Honestly, Gwen! Sometimes they act as if we were pieces of meat!"

'Yes, I need to move: I'm starting to have a reputation on the bachelor scene here...'

Dorothy and the singles bar

Listen, I'm looking for more than just a roll in the mud!

I want to thank you for coming back to my place to see my etchings, Elaine, but I have a confession to make. I don't really have any etchings. I have an Etch-a-Sketch. !

"I like you, but only in a Facebook thumbs up kind of way."

Nah, He's not my stripe

I like the cut of your jib. Okay, full disclosure time: I have a pretty sick jib fetish. ? ?

I am sorry you can't have Sonia,she is for display only.'

"Oh, great... they say they all have headaches."

"Oh, it's feeding time in Egoville?"

'Hi. . . Um. . . Sorry, I thought you were someone else.'

'The Body Shop'

'I knew he was intelligent when he agreed with everything I said'

'Hey baby, how 'bout we go back to my place and do a little family planning?'

"I hear 'mysterious' when you call me creepy."

'The name's Bond . . .Vagabond . . . '

"Nah, I just don't fancy it anymore."

"You reek masculinity."

'I remember when sex on the first date was shocking. Now they don't even bother with a date!'

"So, what time do you get off?"

'I'm looking for a new wife - or one in mint condition.'

'This could be another chapter for my book on easy pickups.'

'I can't believe you actually JOINED the 'Psycho Girlfriend of the Month' Club!'

'Hi -- my name is Dave...', 'Whoa! -- this is moving WAY too fast for me!'