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Sacrifices at 4:00PM and 6:00PM

'You're going to have to make some changes in your lifestyle.'

'You can just forget about the cake.'

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

Forlornaments: Tools to drain individual and team spirit

Another day at work would be one too many...

"Actually, it is a bad time — I’m rushing to get the kids out of the oven."

'Negotiations have reached an impasse, legal recommends we resort to violence.'

Emily Dickinson: Mime - "I think she's saying something about death."

Grim Reaper rowing a boat full of dead souls to the afterlife; a tip jar sits on the side of the boat.

Grim Reaper Buying CDs...

"How about if we just winter in hell?"

"Boy, this blooper reel from 'Manchester by the Sea' is a crack-up."

"The Eggsorcist"

101 uses of a dead cat: disguise.

The Fall of Gnome

Fleeting illusions of happiness hour 5-7

'Because the horned one commands them to, that's how!'

"'Grim Reapers' was considered too offensive, these days we're known as 'afterlife facilitators.'"

'Wait! Let's see if he gets up on his own.'

"Who'd have thought old Harry would turn out to be a vampire?"

100 best beheadings

'I don't think you quite grasp our overall motif.'

'I had no idea would be a choice.'

"And this is our new HR officer in charge of morale..."

"Siri, find an ICU near me."

"Are you Matthew Jones with a double 'T'?"

'Any ideas on motive?' 'Only one, Chief.'

Vlad the Wholesaler

"The boss told me I have to start at the bottom."

"Any references?"

"Congratulations! You've made the short-list for who we're blaming."

'Wait! Wait a minute! Would you hold my glasses?'

'Don't worry. We still have a few more treatment options available.'

Cheap amusement with... THE HAPPY COUPLE!