Dangerous Dabbler Pillows

DANGER - hook and worm...!

"I appreciate your devices that make it seem like you're paying attention, but could you actually pay attention and make eye contact so I know you are?"

'Everybody on the internet now knows I'm a dog, so I'm pretending to be a cat.'

Heroic Rescue from a Falling Tower

'Let's go and make some unfunded spending committments.'

Socially distanced sledding

Chief Foreign Policy Advisor to President Obama.

'When the school upgraded its operating system, for the third time, I upgraded my headache medicine from over-the-counter to prescription strength.'

"Norman's really into wild paddling."

"That's not all I do. Actually I'm a psychological counselor- gymnast-motivational speaker-relaxation therapist-sex worker."

'I can't get the hang of this cloud computing...'

The Screeeen!

'When did 'At Ease' become 'Chill'?'

'I don't surf the net, I just kind of dog-paddle through it.'

"But part of me hopes there never is an Armageddon."

'What was the question?'

'If we are to differentiate ourselves from the private sector we need to focus on a reorientation of our client-facing interactions to prioritise customer led positive responses to intervention scenarios.'

"How can you study while listening to music and TV at the same time?"

'He's at the 'awkward stage' in converting to paperless so he carries both a laptop and a briefcase.'

Poor Holiday Gift Choice...The Lucifer 2500, Talking GPS Device.

Driving school car has sign on the rear; 'How's my learning?'

I'm sure it's here somewhere!

I was having fun making log letters when someone asked "why?" So I Qui

'I hate his more-contagious-than-thou attitude!'

"I'm scanning these old photos we're afraid of losing into my computer so I can lose them there."

'It's just a first draft.'

'I read Robert Gates' memoir. I wish he were still Secretary of Defense so we could cut his budget!'

'She's system two and this is the new beta release.'

Despite their best efforts Hell's scientists were never able to break the scorn barrier,

Toy boat on a tsunami.

Man sees sign at fortune teller featuring mind reading and mind boggling

"Lord, Satan rejected this fireman. What shall we do with him?

I accidently deleted my hard drive, but it's okay. All the important stuff is on the refrigerator anyway.

"Unfortunately polishing my mouse isn't as relaxing sharpening my pencils."

Badminton/Goodminton